Mark Twain “Talking about music is like dancing and talking about architecture.” Steve Martin “If any of you cry at my funeral, I’ll never speak to you again.” Stan Laurel “Don’t be so humble—you’re not that great.” Golda Meir “How Can a Civil War Happen?” George Carlin “When I finally met Mr. Right, I didn’t know his name was Always.” Rita Rudner “If you live to be a hundred years old, you are successful.
A good sense of humor is a tonic
Few people die after that age.” George Burns “Laugh, the world laughs with you, snores, you sleep alone.” Anthony Burgess “Why do they call it rush hour when there’s nothing left?” Robin Williams “If you’re going to tell people the truth, be funny, or they Italy WhatsApp Number List ‘ll kill you.” Billy Wilder “You know the troubles of real life? Music without danger.” Jim Carrey “When life gives you a lemon, chop it right away.” Bill Watson “Common sense is like deodorant. The people who need it most will never use it.
Unknown “I used to sell furniture for a living. The problem is, it’s my own.” Les Dawson “Days without sun are like, you know, night.” Steve Martin “The truth hurts. Probably not as good as jumping on a bike without a seat, but it hurts.” Lt. Frank Drebin (Leslie Nelson) “Under no circumstances should sleeping pills and laxatives be taken on the same night.” Dave Barry “I’m not for everyone. I’m hardly for me.” Mark Malone “A clear conscience is often a sign of a bad memory.